Monday, November 28, 2011

For my closest friend

My Closest friend died November 20th, her funeral was Wednesday November 23. 

this picture was taken after her losing her hair to chemo (we thought she was in remission), her hair grew back and Elaine had her stylist pamper Sue for the day... we made an evening of it with dinner and drinks. Alexi took this picture, and while I was supposed to hold the card to reflect the light to the left side of her face, I forgot to get out of the story , I am sticking to it!

Her birthday is this coming Saturday, and I am going to make sure it is an important day for Marv  (her husband).

I was asked by Sue to speak at the service. When I tried to share what I was going to say about her, she said , "I trust you."  
HThis is what i said:

Today we bid farewell to our dear Sue. She wanted me to share a few things that you may or may not know about Her.

Sue was a lefty.
      Her favorite color was green, 
            She loved leaves, chickens, and flamingos.
                     Autumn was her favorite season.

Sue was a talented knitter, quilter, fisherwoman and hunter. 
       She could gut a deer, bait a hook, thread a needle, and coach someone through a difficult knitting pattern equally well.  

    She had motion sickness,  she always rode shotgun, but would prefer to be behind the steering wheel, if at all possible.
    I often kidded her that her slow, cautious driving was like walking...but without wasting shoe leather. 
     She could back into a parking space better than anyone I have ever seen. Same with parking a boat or trailer. 

        She could not sleep with the light on... even the smoke detector light would keep her awake.   
             "Hi GUYS"  was NOT an acceptable greeting if Sue Nelson was in your group. Especially at a restaurant.
          When she went out for breakfast, her eggs better be cooked hard with no runny yolk or white, whatsoever. And absolutely no egg shells, thank you!
She made the best deviled eggs, but made chili with no spices whatsoever.

   Sue was a heroine, while out camping at Lake Poinsett, a  motorbike accident ripped the foot off a young man... she was first on the scene, bound his leg to keep him from bleeding to death, and kept him from going into shock.   She was commended by the parks department for her life-saving act and brave effort.

Sue's life is being celebrated half-way around the world....her virtual family in Australia, "Margaret's mob" and Katharine Gunn  will never forget her generous gifts of knitting supplies, love and support. They had planted a Tasmanian OAK tree months ago in her honor, and visited it on Sunday...just hours before she died. 

Sue was skilled in dog obedience training, as is evident in the behavior of my pug, Pucci...and our beloved Mr B.
      She  was a matchmaker...Right Chad?  Jennifer?
                             Tanner and Alex, you are on your own. 

          Sue's biggest fear was being forgotten by her Daimy, Corbin, Sydney, Ronin, and Hunter....
                   NOT a chance...
              She was a doting grandma... She loved them "to the moon and back."

          She wanted to to name Ronin "Razzor" so we could use up all the excess "z" letters in her scrap-booking alphabet sets. She lost that one.

                  She was a self-less mother, and loving wife.
                       Her mother, brothers and sister adore her. 
                    The XRX family is handicapped
                                       and heart-broken by her illness and death.  

She has many names......
Marv calls her "Honey", she is "Mom" to Marshall and Kelly Sue,
    Her family calls her "Susie", and "Auntie Susie." 
          "Sue Bee" was her nickname at Hutchinson Technologies.
XRX Editorial call her "our Sue."
         The grandkids call her  "Grandma Sue". 
                 Guess which name was her favorite? 

Sue and Marv treated me like family,  I always had a place to go on the weekend, a holiday, or anytime I was feeling lonely. 
         She was my closest friend, I could tell her anything.
We would share a wink, or a smile...and words weren't necessary.
     I would spend time with her, and  minutes after most every visit, one of of us would call the other with a reminder, or something we forgot to say, and I would start our conversation with "I miss you already." I stopped that when she decided to cease her experimental treatments.

Sue struggled through 3 bouts of cancer—and although she was frustrated by feelings of helplessness—she faced it with strength, dignity, and her infectious smile.   
          She fought through to see her and Marv's 40th wedding anniversary, and escaped cancer's grasp only days before her 60th birthday. 

She asked us to address her death "as death."

Sue taught me patience, kindness, and generosity...and showed me what Trust, Courage, and Faith are all about.   

My life will never be the same...not because she is gone, but because she was here. 

Sue, I miss you already!


  1. I am so sorry to read about the loss of your friend. It is very clear from your eulogy that she was well-loved and a remarkable woman.

  2. Hello - I was not aware this existed but someone just sent me the link to it. The kids are missing Sue but knitting harder than ever.
    They are, as they discussed with Sue and with me, raising yet more money in her memory. It is being used to send some young refugee children in Africa to high school.
    Her tree has survived a very hot summer and Anne and Sarah (the two girls in the group) say it is looking strong and healthy.
    (You may not be aware of it but the kids were up in the middled of our night for her service. They thought the world of her - and so did I.)